It all boils down to what of our lives we are trying to save—or what defenses we are building so that the structure of our lives will not be changed in any way. Are the lives we are leading now, so steeped with God's love that we see no need of any divine adjustments? Is forgiveness automatic with us? Do people flock to us for healing? Are we Christ-like in every way? Are our lives really worth preserving as they are? Are we so sure that what we are and what other people are seeing in us, is the best we can be? Exactly what can God do with us to make us more like Christ? Would it not be necessary for us to relinquish our lives to His care in order for His changes to take place? How is this done?

Jesus shed His blood on the cross for us all. This includes the people God placed in our lives, who cause us pain and suffering. That is the straightforward and blunt way of saying it. God sends people who challenge us to call on Him more often, thereby allowing God to move in US deeply, adjusting us and making us more like Him. Since God sent Jesus to die for them as well as us, the least we can do is be willing to show them the same forgiveness Jesus promised we could all have, when He was on the cross. We invariably have much resistance toward those challenging people God places in our lives, don't we?

Why do we have to be responsible for showing forgiveness to those (Christians or non-Christians) who irritate us? One reason is it drives home the truth of what the Lord did for us when we, with God's help, provide forgiveness to others who are persecuting or are otherwise being obnoxious to us. We can all use a booster shot of running to Jesus and the world never fails to provide opportunities where we must call upon Him for help in forgiveness. Satan's position, we should remember, is to encourage us to be defensive and understand the world's “truth” that everything is everyone else's fault. This inevitably leads to much pain.

God places irritating people in our lives so that we might know God, ourselves and His children better. God's children can certainly drive us to seeking God, particularly if they are insensitive and we are frustrated with them. If we are trying to escape from God's children, we have missed God's point (which is the only true point there is) and will continue to receive urgings from God. He will send future relationships in which the same issues keep coming up, again and again. Satan wants people to get under our skin so we will attack them. He does not want us to obtain healing from God. God's healing offends him because it means he is out of the picture, totally. God wants us to love these people instead which, through our forgiveness, heals us. Satan encourages constant criticism and correction of others from what we deem is our “perfect” perspective. God says, “Allow me to correct your perspective, which is quite unsound.” God is reminding us that we must take on the mantle of Christ, learn to raise our sights above the battlefield, and humbly rest in His forgiving and compassionate way. Will we ever get it?

The Bible says in Matthew 7:2 that what we do to others, God will do to us. If we are judgmental to God's children, God will appear to be distant and judgmental to us. The more we try to correct others, the more God will try to correct us by sending His children to us who will once again, irritate us OR if, praise God, we “get it” we'll be driven to our knees in prayer, as we allow God to adjust us from the need to judge. We know we need correction from God. There is no doubt about it, but it does not need to be so harsh, so painful, so disrupting. And it won't be, if we can realize how important it is to be humble and open to God's way of molding us into His likeness. We don't want to fight God and His ways. We want to love God and His ways. His Son has already been slain for our sins. We do not need to keep being slain, again and again except in the sense that we die daily. Our “death daily” is a gradual unencumbering process, where we are letting go of the many layers (or cloaks) of ego and carnality, thereby getting to know God and express His Spirit in greater and greater ways. This is a good thing. However, the type of death whereby we hang on, clutching tightly to our “rights” and choosing to NEVER let go of offenses is detrimental and not representative in the least of what Jesus did for us from the cross. Nor does it lend itself to bringing in potential Christians, who often linger on the fringes of the darkness of the world. Except through us, they may never know Jesus. What response are we showing them as the world flings its refuse into our faces? What response are we showing them, as we cope with what THEY lay before us? How we react speaks volumes about our faith in Jesus.

The ideal correction is one in which we are working in tandem with our Creator, striving to know Him through His children, which He has placed in our lives for this very purpose. We truly get to know ourselves and God in as painless a way as possible when we humbly go to God and ask Him to help us forgive people for what they are doing to us, rather than being judgmental and critical.

We have built personality structures that have their bases in the carnal world and arch into the sky. We are very attached to these structures, but we need to be able to let them go; let them die. These structures are what Jesus is referring to when He told us, “He who tries to save his life, shall lose it…” These personality structures we have built that are rooted in the carnal world can be chipped away, with our permission. We do not need to defend them. When we do, our feelings are constantly getting hurt, our toes are continually being stepped on and our shoulders are permanently slouched. It is difficult to allow something we have worked so hard to build to die. But it must be done.

Some may wonder if life is even worth living, if our personality structure is no longer allowed to have its voice in this world. Far above this vast world of pain in which we have had to constantly protect our false selves, lies the kingdom of God. Our home in God awaits the false structures' demise. At first it doesn't seem so enticing, though. As we allow the Holy Spirit to do His duty and dismantle our false and Satan-influenced selves, we will feel as if we are dying. In a sense, we are. But this death must be welcomed. It is necessary before God's promised abundant life can be made real to us. It is only in this abundant life that people, from all walks of life, will be drawn to Christ because the fruit of His Spirit will be so compelling to them.

Our carnal flesh attempts its own preservation, therefore we are hell-bent to defend our puny selves by lashing back at the very people God sent into our lives, so He can dismantle our phony personality structures. We should hug them and thank them profusely for what they are doing. If not for them, we would not have a clue as to what needed to be pruned out of us, by the Lord.

This is important stuff. Be grateful when people use their words like knives. They are actually being used by God to whittle us down. If we choose to do the right thing and go to God and ask Him to help us forgive them, this allows God to prune our souls which is what we want. Then, rather than defend ourselves, we will be compelled to go instead to our quiet places within and commune with God, asking Him to take away all within us that causes us to have pain in the first place. We must ask God to heal us even though the tendency is to ask God to heal them. God will take care of healing us all, should we be so inclined to allow it. We must not be so arrogant as to think we know what someone else needs. Our healing through the Word is all we're responsible for and our healing is all we want. But our healing goes far beyond just ourselves. Many more are healed by our example and our Christ-like attitude, which is the fruit of our healing.

It may be that we're afraid to try and contact God by ourselves as if He's too far to reach. The Word says He is near to us and a very present help in trouble. God knows us and loves us as we are but knows, also, that we desire to be free from Satan-inflicted pains and troubles. We must go to Him as we'd go to any friend. We must give Him our all. We must hold back nothing from Him. He will never hold anything against us but, instead, will be continually pruning us and making us more like Him. The Word declares: “Faithful are the wounds of a friend.” His wounds are faithful. He is the One we want to mirror so we must sidle up to our Creator and rejoice. Every day is a day the Lord has made, and He made it for this purpose! How else will people be compelled to know the saving grace of Jesus Christ, unless we show them this saving grace in our actions and life? If we don't forget about ourselves and our hurts, we will be living just as the rest of the world lives. Then, we may talk a good, convincing Jesus story but our walk will be quite crippled. Praise God that Jesus can still use us, even though we struggle so.

The way it works, then, is if we defend our Satan-based-carnal-world-survival-of-the-fittest self, by lashing back at people God sent to tear it down, God will send more people to do the job. We simply will eventually be unable to maintain our false selves any longer and will cry, “Uncle” to God, falling on our knees in supplication and prayer. God, then, plucks the dross, the weeds, and the Satan-based garbage from our souls, once we are willing to let Him.Then, a mighty weight is lifted from our shoulders as we walk this world with a lighter step, increasing joy, and greater trust in the Almighty.

Greater defenses bring greater pain, yet great healing is accomplished, as we allow pruning by the Holy Spirit. Or it can be greater defenses bring greater pain and no healing, as walls are allowed to grow higher and thicker, protecting our flimsy and flashy-fake selves. However, less defenses bring less pain, and is indicative of one who is increasingly joyful and more and more healed. Life is a bowling alley. We have set up pins of resentment, grudges, anger, envy, (insert your most besetting carnal or flesh trait here). God sends a bowling ball made of people who seemingly deliberately bring out our fleshly qualities by knocking the hell out of us. (By the way, that last sentence is quite accurate—these people are irritating us, and contributing to our healing as we give the hellish and painful experiences over to God.)

God has put in our lives, everything and everyone that is needed for our maturity in Christ. When God sends the ball rolling down the ally, it is always a strike. Everyone in our lives is part of that ball. There is no one to spare. The pins of our carnality are knocked down to be swept away by the Holy Spirit, never to rise again, as we pray to God to forgive those who appear to be our “enemy.” But are they really our enemy, if they are only doing God's will and showing us our hidden, fleshly selves?

Jesus died for our sins. When we allow our puny flesh selves to die, as others rile us, by our contrite and impassioned forgiveness of them, God can show us His forgiveness to us (according to Matthew 7:2's law). The sooner we can recognize that gratefulness, rather than resentment, should be our response, the better. Let's not wait a moment longer. Do not be afraid to allow the carnal, fleshly selves to be slain on the cross. In truth, we have no desire for perpetrating this self any longer. It needs to “rest in peace” so that we can, at last, truly rest in peace!

Let's not forget the real point here is that we can be better followers of Christ so that, in our daily walk, the lost are awakened to God's light shining brightly in us. Let us prepare for the coming of the Lord as we cry out in the wilderness, just as John the Baptist did, many years ago.

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