This tiniest of irritations that cannot, it seems, be fixed right now. I have tried pushing the river, talking to management, but it remains. I've tried asking God for help but He does not respond. I would like to be strong enough, spiritually, to handle this. Is this my problem? Maybe I don't know how to submit something like this to God. Ultimately, it isn't me that overcomes anything but Christ IN me who does. Right now, though, I buckle at the knees, I'm almost down for the count because of this. Invariably, I lose it and am driven to wails and gnashing of teeth (figuratively, of course. I always maintain my dignity and my sense of professionalism. But deep within my teeth grind a little and I have been known to whimper some.)

This tiny irritation is leading me to God. It is hard to believe but because all things work for good to those who love the Lord, it is. I have such resistance to what is happening, though. There is not a tried "human path" that has worked for me. Thoughts that have taken go-carts through my mind include: going home tonight and not coming back until someone fixes the irritation and tossing the mechanical source of the irritation onto the floor and stomping on it until the irritation is ground into the fibers of the carpet later to be sucked up and disposed of by the janitorial crew.

This irritation has gone on for many weeks, coming and going. It gives me a little respite now and then until it comes on full strength driving me up the proverbial wall. I want to learn what God wants me to learn. But instead, I teach myself that this mechanical anomaly is bothering me. What am I to do? What am I to do?

This "tiny" problem cannot be fixed right now but is scheduled for repair soon. It has led me to make some new requests of God. Somehow, past Satan, past his fleshly domination, God can give me the peace of mind I so desire. I believe this. I do. But where is this peace now? Where?

I do not know how it will be tomorrow. I could blow it. I could start ranting and raving about how I want it my way. But, the way I'm thinking now, I probably won't approach it that way. It isn't very pragmatic and it leads to much frustration. No, I will allow my focus to dwell on wanting the peace of God through all the irritating factors of my life. It doesn't really matter what that irritating factor is, does it? If it drives me to a fresh state of mind in which the desire for the peace of God is piqued, then it has become a tool of the Holy Spirit and is no longer Satan's toy, his ploy in which he tells me that this is an unjust world that he rules. It is my focus that needs God's adjustment, not the world. In truth, I no longer want to focus on the mammon of the world, but on God instead.

The small irritations of the world need to be included as factors that lead us to God. The major problems of the world are obvious cries for God. But the tiny, irrepressible paper cuts and pencil sharpener problems are sprinkled like dust all over this crumbling world, drawing us closer and closer to God, as well.  

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